Day 2, 3 and 4. Already behind! Day 100+

Well...starting again. I put on 20 pounds over the last year and a half since my car accident. Partly because I haven't had a car so it was hard to get places like the gym and to surf. But also because it was extremely depressing and lastly because I stopped taking diet pills.
I  determined to get back to my fighting weight (140 pounds) without help. Every time I've lost the weight in the last 15 years it was with help. Now I gotta figure out how to do it on my own. Since money has been tight with no vehicle it meant that I couldn't afford my allergy meds or diet pills. Yes it's a good thing to be off of both but the bad thing is that I tend to eat when I'm bored.  Lollipops seem to help especially in the afternoon but it would be nice not to need those either. Yes they are full of sugar but they only have 80 calories and last me an hour and curbs my craving to eat other stuff.
The other piece is that I'm not hungry when I eat a lot of the time. It takes a lot of self control to stop myself. Especially after 5pm when I know metabolism is at its slowest. I'm usually home and tired and my body wants a pick me up so it goes for junk and sugar. This is when the lollipops help the most. Gonna try to just have 2 a day from 5pm on for 30 days and then try to cut them out from there.
Its crazy how sugar can take over your life. I also think I need more fiber to help with the sugar. I heard that the sugar craving may be in part due to lack of fiber and since my meds make constipation a problem it may be making it even worse than that. Gonna try bran muffins and see if that helps too.
Okay. Here we go. Day 3. Keep up the good work!
Oh...I should mention how hard I workout. Surfing, yoga, swimming, weight room. I workout intensely for about 2 hours a day or more sometimes. I am not sitting on my ass doing nothing. I am currently the fattest person at yoga and it Pisses me off. You would never know that I've been there for 7 and a half years. It looks like I've been there 7 days!

What you don't see...m

What you didn't see from yesterday's food intake was the costco frozen yogurt, the 3 lollipops, and the handful of nasty easter candy plus the 10 crackers I had. Crazy right? Well its actually an improvement for me as of lately. Thats the problem. I'm hoping tracking it will help. I'm not sure if it's bored or depressed or craving causing it. I've never had my sugar intake this way. I have a feeling it's also thst since I took stimulants out my body is trying to replace it. Normally I would exercise and it would go away but since my transportation has been hit or miss I get stuck at home and stressed and then I eat sugar.

Today's food intake:

Breakfast: coffee, 2 trader Joe's pop tarts and 1 lollipop and an orange.
Lunch: goat cheese, crackers,  and an apple.
Dinner: sausage, homemade pretzel and green beans.
Snack: protein bar (Luna) and fruit

Although yesterday was better I know it has to change way more still. It'll be the first time in my adult life that I've changed it on my own. It all started with my knee surgery and went from there. Since I couldn't exercise like I wanted to and the doctors wanted the extra weight off my knee and I had no transportation. ..I found that metabolife worked for me. That was almost 20 years ago now. Every time I've gone off of it, I gain it back. Every time I go back on it, I lose the weight. I'm not even hungry. Just my body asking for what it thinks is missing...may e vitamin deficiency?  I know its not a protein thing which is what so many articles claim is the problem. I take iron, magnesuim, zinc, and b complex too.

Here goes today!

Starting over.....again

Well....here I am again. Posting another blog that I probably won't follow through with. Guess I'll start with how much things have changed.
Going on my 3rd month of being kicked out of my own home. Big fight in december and carols solution was to have me go back and forth between my moms and home when the kids aren't there. Made things harder not easier. No one else sacrificed anything but me.
Second. Finally got permission to start my own team! Yay! Except I have no idea how long it will take nor how to do it. But I'm gonna make it work somehow.
Third. I owe a bunch of bills and no money. Truck sucked up 2500 thus far which was the last of my settlement money. After next week I gotta hope that unemployment kicks in.
4th thing. I'm heavy and sick and in pain. I put on prob 25 or more pounds and it needs to come off now! Ive never been able to without diet pills. About a year and a half ago I finally got off diet pills and zyrtec d which has a stimulant in it. I have been on both for about 10 years. Same thing happened the last time I went off of them.
Its not that I'm hungry. Some of it I think is that with the meds I'm on my body is craving something to clean out my system. Sugar seems to be the thing it wants most. Even though I don't eat processed sugar that's what it wants. I'm giving myself til the end of may to take it off but I need to track what I eat. Its still calories in and out but I need to go back to way Way less after 5pm. Its the only thing that has worked before. Not sure how my body will react without the stimulants to help it along. But its gotta change. For now, this blog will be my tracking system. I'm not willing to weigh myself yet but I know that in 2 weeks I mustve put on at least 5 more pounds. My shorts BARELY fit now. Not happy.

Breakfast was 1 pop tart and 2 handfuls of sweet and salty trail mix and 5 small size peanut butter cups. The single bite ones not the regular. See what I mean?

Lunch will be 1/2 container mac and cheese and an apple.

Dinner is orange chicken and either green beans or peas...not sure how to do it early tho cuz practice goes til 530 or 545 and I don't get home until after 7pm. Guess I will figure it out.